Professors - Unplugged !!!

Last month,there happened to be an alumni meeting at our alma mater ,Loyola School.We passed out of school nearly 10 years ago and I haven't quite been a frequent visitor at school since.The school had changed a lot and while we passed the staff room,there weren't many familiar faces there too.I hoped I could see atleast one of our teachers,but couldn't.They had been real special and the staff room bought with it some memories of some truly magnificent teachers that we had.

The first one has to be Jacob Mathew Sir,our chemistry professor.He was around 60,almost always impeccably dressed,in pucca formals,and seriously,if he gave a modelling career a thought,Raymonds and Peter Englands would be at his doorsteps the next day,vying with each other to woo him.Such was the charm he had,and add to it a level head with a toungue that could never utter something unless it was absolutely necessary and appropriate,he was the complete package - a gentleman,head to toe.And we gave him one of the cutest nicknames one could ever think of - Jams - a short for Jacob Mathew sir.Once he was giving a class test and underprepared as we were,malpractice was a foregone conclusion.The thing was not in commiting the sin,but it was in doing it as stealthily as you ever could.One of my classmates,Shivaji,was not very good at being inconspicous,and in a moment of desparation,resorted to peeking into the book of the guy sitting behind him and could not escape Jams's probing eyes which picked him out almost immediately.Normally in such situations,the guy is made to stand and undergo a dressing down right then.But Jams's response was a classic.He reached over his shoulder,looked at Shivaji and gently quipped,
"Shivaji,dont strain too much .You will break your neck ".
There was a delay while the joke sank in,and then the class roared with laughter.

Then there was Gayathri Manohar,our english professor till class Ten.She was the iron lady,with a heart of gold,and with her stern looks and imposing presence,could glare down even Mike Tyson with ease.The only time I remember her soften was at the funeral of one of our classmates,,while we were in class Ten,during which she was uncontrollably in tears.With her,there was no messing around,no half-measures,no pranks and she was the ultimate taskmaster.Her nickname too,almost went wonderfully in tune with the terror that she generated.Gayathri and Manohar got truncated identically to leave Ga and Ma,and the name GaMa just stuck.Once she was about to teach an act from The Merchant Of Venice,by William Shakespeare,when she asked for a copy of the book from one of us.One guy,Boney stood up in a trice and proudly took his book to her.There was reason for him to be proud,as he was one of the guys who came under constant chiding from GaMa for not coming to class with a proper text book.Moreover the book was neatly covered.But for some strange reason,instead of writing the full name-"The Merchant Of Venice"-on the cover,he inscribed just the first letters of each word.
As a result,the book cover read "T.m.o.v".
GaMa took one close look,frowned,then let out the rarest of smiles and said,
"Boney,I dont want the Russian version.Could you please give me the english version instead?".
A bewildered Boney,all his enthusiasm evaporated,was left struggling for words.

Another incredible teacher was Deepa Pillai,alias DP,our English teacher in the Plus Two course.Pint sized and frail,her appearance belied the energy and enthusiasm which she carried within.School days,dramas - whatever cultural programme held at school- the strings were and had to be pulled by DP herself.I haven't seen a better english teacher,and for each verse from Shakespeare's classic tragedy,Hamlet,she would enthrall the class with its hidden meanings,puns and umpteen connotations.And she was very concerned with the grades that each of us were managing to get in each exams and was particularly exasperated with the performance of one of the boys in our class,Harish.He was a gifted hoopster,the school general captain and one of the top athletes in the school,and had then taken to playing the jazz drums for the school choir.Inspite of being an extremely intelligent guy,his grades at school had plummeted badly,and DP badly wanted him to focus more on studies and less on drumming,and one particular day,while distributing the mark sheets to each student,Harish's grades drove her to despair,and she exclaimed,
"And Harish,will you please STop BAnging away at those BLessed DRums?".
The sentence was so magnificently accented and delivered that it came close to resembling a drumbeat sequence in itself.We all stared,impressed at the verse,as DP acknowledged our open mouthed admiration with a sweet little smile,and nonchalantly continued with the distribution of the mark sheets.

There are still much more about school,about which I could go on writing forever.It is great fun recollecting them,and saves me the trouble of reciting boring events,which seem to have "happened" in every school,every year,every batch like how the chemistry professor asked to "take an iron rod of any metal" or how the drill master instructed to open the windows to "let the air force come in".

Teachers at Loyola,take a bow !!